Post by Ayu on Mar 20, 2024 18:44:15 GMT -5
And here it was, another fall. This body was so clumsy, it was the third time Ayu had tripped and landed beautifully with her face hitting the ground. Was it because of her tail or lack of balance or this feeling of not being adjusted to her body... Or all at once? It was uncomfortable and uneasy and she didn't like it - but she was trying not to cry. Ayu tried to repeat in her head everything that could prevent her from tearing up. It won't fix anything. It won't change her back. It will only make her sister and brother worried if they see her crying. It will make her a nuisance as her Grandpa used to say a lot... So she couldn't cry more now. Especially because her little big sister was watching. Sniffling just a little, nodding, and rubbing her nose, Ayu made a scrunchy face, carefully touching her cheeks. She smiled at Zuqetta and gestured that she would be alright - the wounds would heal, as usual. It didn't change that it still hurt - ouch... Nothing seemed to be damaged but two hits on her nose were making it a bit sensitive to touch... And red, which looked quite prominent compared to her pink and blushed cheeks.
Not to mention that being so clumsy and causing trouble in this situation, which wasn't in her intention, wasn't making things easier. Still, it happened, making Ayu feel guilty and embarrassed. It... It felt like she should go to her room, hug Lumby, and not bother Calot and Zuqetta when they would be thinking about what to do... But her room was over there, in Palace, and they needed to get there first. Sitting on the ground, Ayu tried to collect herself and not give in to those worries that were still sitting in the back of her head. Patting her cheeks to make sure she was alright, she dusted her shoulders and was ready to get up and be back on their walk - when an unexpected view grew right in front of her.
Zuqetta was crying. O-Oh no. Seeing teardrops making her black eyes shiny and then quietly rolling down her round cheeks made Ayu stare at her in shock. What... W-Why? What did she say..? It was a question, but Ayu was so alarmed by her tears that she didn't hear it at first. Only half a minute later the sense of words got to her. She wanted to know if she was angry with her little big sister, and she asked if she made her upset..?
Ayu's yellow eyes snapped wide open and she started to shake her head in panic. No, no, no..! O-Of course not... What has she done now, to make her big sister think that she was upset like that...? Ayu's shoulders shivered and her fingers started fidgeting. Granted, she was unhappy that even when she tried to plead, Zuqetta still attacked that poor, hurting being from back then, but she was only sad about it, not angry or disappointed. That attack from back then made them miserable and in pain. Raising her hands, not knowing what to do, Ayu waved them in a flustered, anxious manner, trying to calm down the misunderstanding... But how could she do so?
The thought that somehow she made Zuqetta think that she was upset with her, to the point that it brought her to tears, made Ayu teary-eyed too. If anything, she would be the one upsetting her, for being clumsy, tearful, and scared, despite her big sister comforting her so much... That's why she had to be brave, right? The guilt swelled up and tied a clutch around her neck.
Ayu's finger wrote the letters in the brown and orange sand next to her. Be brave to not worry her sister further. Right. Though the only thing she could do was to lower her head and shake it again, this time slower. Tears dropped on her lap, staining the clothing with wet dots... But her hand still moved.
She really wasn't upset, she wasn't... The only thing Ayu felt now was worry. Zuqetta was tearing up and she didn't know what she did wrong. But she did something, otherwise, her sister wouldn't be asking about it, right? Her fingers, no, her arms were shaking. The panic she felt at the sight of little Queen's tears started now to grow inside her chest, fueled by fright that she had done something, again, again, and again. Something that irritates others so much that-
So, she was reminded of her grandfather. Of this giant man who was always being upset at her that she did something - or that she didn't. Still, it was her fault. A heart-clutching realization came to her, mercilessly poking Ayu's core with cold needles. It wasn't the first time she felt this concern and confusion, that she made someone very angry or sad and she didn't know why... It was similar to the situation from back then. To her time living in the tiny, cramped house near the forest.
Grandpa Zhang was right... She thought in panic and now her eyelids started to swell with tears but Ayu could only nod, trying to wipe her face. Maybe Grandpa was right after all - she was bothering everyone too much.
PL - 1,500
WC - 884
TWC - 7,408